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Movies > Lists > 37 Vampire Films That Really Do Suck
 
Vampire Assassins

2. VAMPIRE ASSASSINS

The bounty is blood!

Released: 2005
Director: Ron Hall (debut).
Starring: Ron Hall, Gerald Okamura, Mel Novak, Rudy Ray Moore, Anthony Chow and Merry Everest.

 

The synopsis goes something like this ...

Ambitious cop Derek (Hall) is dogged by a phobia that is unfortunate in his line of work. Having witnessed his father's murder as a young child, he is deathly afraid of blood, but when he takes the law into his own hands to catch underworld counterfeiter Gustoff Slovak (Novak), he is forced to face his fear. The operation blows up in his face, resulting in a massacre that leaves Derek the only one of his team to survive. Derek reaches the shocking conclusion that Slovak is actually a vampire, and joins forces with the last in a long line of vampire hunters, Master Kao (Okamura), who agrees to train Derek in his ancient art. But, in order to combat Slovak - whose past intersects with Derek's own in disturbing ways - Derek must become that which he hates the most: a vampire.
- Courtesy of Rotten Tomatoes.

 
... ...
 

Something to sink your teeth into ...

Quite obviously a blatant, not to mention badly done, Blade rip-off with African-American martial artist Hall in the lead role. He ain't no Wesley Snipes. Hall can take most of the blame for the mess that is Vampire Assassins as he was also both writer and director for the one and only time in his career. Interestingly, Hall was seen briefly as a stuntman in Orgazmo (1997), the superhero/porn spoof from South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

A review from someone who's seen it ... Chud.com

IMDb Rating ... 1.5 (269 votes)

 
 
       
     
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